Here are a few things I've learned throughout my time here:
1. My role as a U.S. citizen abroad. The role of the U.S. in Chilean history is vast and sad. From helping to create a terrible dictatorship to financing the disappearance and murder of thousands of Chilean citizens, the U.S. government has always had a part in Chilean history. For that reason, being from the U.S. has always felt a bit odd to me here. Not only do I have to carry the weight around with me knowing that where I'm from has done this, I also stick out like a sore thumb. Between my light complexion and blonde hair (in the U.S. I would never say I'm blonde but here I very much am), I am obviously not Chilean. So then people always ask where I'm from and when I say los Estados Unidos, there's a lot of ways people take it. Either they're jealous, they look at me with disgust, or they're fascinated by a gringa that can speak Spanish decently.
In addition to all of this, the U.S. culture has a huge influence on Chilean culture, specifically popular culture. One of my favorite things to do in Chile is go to the clubs and dance. Before I came to Chile, I was so excited to go out and listen to reggaeton and Chilean music in the clubs. However, about 90% of the music is from the U.S. At first I was completely surprised. But then I talked some to my host sister about music and her favorite artists are Adele and Taylor Swift. Not only does the U.S. influence music, but a lot of little things like shop names and labels are U.S. words or names. One of the biggest grocery stores here is called Lider and it's a Walmart company. The biggest food brand here is Nestle, and a lot of stores have english words in the titles because that supposedly makes it more high end.
The most important thing I've learned about being "estadounidense" (what they call people from the U.S. here) is that people from the U.S. aren't they only Americans. If someone here asks you where you're from and you say America, they're confused because they're American too. America doesn't just consist of the U.S., it's a multitude of countries. The U.S. isn't the center of the world, as sometimes we like to believe. We are just a small part of what is considered America and I think this is an important lesson that everyone should learn.
2. My ability to live without things I'm used to. I have gone the last five months without seeing my parents, hugging my dog, or seeing my best friends. And surprisingly, I've survived. For all who know me, I'm definitely an introvert and a homebody. I love being away from home but also being able to come back when I want to. With this experience, I couldn't do that. I couldn't go home and see my dog or my mom and I managed to survive.
3. My ability to adapt. The Chilean culture is entirely different than what I'm used to. I had to get used to living with a family again and letting someone know where I am at all times, living without the people that I'm used to, and eating food that I am not accustomed to eating. Despite all this, here I am five months later still alive. There were definitely moments where I was laying on my bed crying about the fact that I didn't think I could live in Chile for one more moment. But I lived through them and I definitely think I'm stronger because of it. (Of course it's a lot easier to say that on this side of things, but y'know we'll just go with it for now.)
4. Our role in the world is really insignificant. To be honest, this one seems a little silly. But I think my mantra of the trip has been, "We don't matter." Obviously, we do matter. But I have had the opportunity to experience everything from giant glaciers and mountains, to one of the driest deserts in the world, to seeing another universe. In Torres del Paine, I got to see a giant glacier, giant mountains, and natural rock formations unlike anything I've ever seen in the U.S. In San Pedro de Atacama, I basically saw the moon. I was in one of the driest deserts in the world. And on my astrology tour, I literally saw another universe with my naked eye. So yeah, maybe it is the end of the world for me when I ran out of milk for my morning coffee. But in the grand scheme, that doesn't matter. These amazing places created by nature, that matters more than running out of milk.
5. Food matters. Now, I have definitely adapted to the food here. That being said, I can't wait to get back to the U.S. and actually eat healthy again. The three foods that are eaten at every meal here are: bread, mayonnaise, and salt. I'm not kidding when I say they are at every meal. The average Chilean eats about 12 pieces of bread a day. A very typical Chilean breakfast is a cheese and butter sandwich. Ew. No thank you. Lunch usually consists of a salad (yay!) but then the dressing for the salad is mayonnaise. All the lunch food is cooked with a handful of salt and another sprinkle when it's done. Dinner isn't really dinner. It's sandwiches again, this time with mayonnaise, cheese, and ham. You get a tea too, except it has two tablespoons of sugar in it.
Having said all that, I really can't wait to get back to the U.S. and just eat a salad. Anyone who sees me within the first month or two of me being home will notice that I've gained weight here. And a decent amount for it to be this noticeable. For those who see me, don't mention it, please. I know I've gained weight and I'm working to get rid of it. The food we eat really does make a difference. I feel tired here a lot and I think that has to do a lot with how I'm eating. I definitely don't get the recommended amount of fruits and veggies, and eat way more carbs than I should. I also overeat here, a problem I never had in the U.S. Food matters and I can't wait to start eating like my normal self again.
6. My culture isn't necessarily the best. There are aspects of the Chilean culture that I have entirely loved. The biggest difference between Chilean and U.S. culture (for me) is that kids live with their parents a lot of the time until they're in their 30's. And even if they don't live with their parents, they call them everyday. There have been plenty of times I've been with my Chilean friends and they had to leave the room because it was the the time that they called their mom everyday. Whereas in the U.S., it's common that I don't talk to my parents for weeks at a time. There are aspects of the culture, such as this, that are definitely better in the Chile and that I hope to bring back to the U.S.
7. The complaints that I have everyday in the U.S. are definitely not always the biggest problems. I have seen extreme poverty and suffering here. I listened to the terrible disappearances of loved ones and family members of almost every family in Chile. I've heard terrible stories of domestic violence, abuse, rape, and inequality. Of course, all of these things exists in the U.S., but the magnitude and prevalence here is completely different. There have been so many times when I've been walking home alone, both at night and during the day, and I've been afraid that someone is going to come rob me, rape me, or kill me. These fears exist at a level that's nowhere near the level they exist in the U.S. for me. So all the complaints I have in the U.S. about being tired or cold are nothing in comparison to what some people live through.
8. The U.S. isn't the center of my universe. There are plenty of other places I can live and succeed. I have grown up with the idea that I will always spend my entire life in the U.S. But this experience has taught me without any uncertainty that I can survive and strive in another country. Because of this experience, I really would love to live in a foreign country and teach English. I have loved being able to live in a different culture than I'm used to and being able to do it again would be amazing. Although I have definitely struggled with having to speak Spanish all the time, I have also loved it. Coming back to a place where I would be able to do that would be amazing.
9. I am so excited to get back to a very liberal society. My time in Chile has been amazing and completely eye opening. That being said, it has also opened my eyes to the liberalness of U.S. society. I can't wait to get home and be able to openly speak my thoughts. I can't wait to tell people I'm Jewish, and not be afraid that they won't accept me. I can't wait to go home and not hear people being homophobic, racist, and classist at every moment of the day. Of course all of these things exist in the U.S. as well, but not nearly to the same extent that they exist here. The host student who was at my house before me was a gay guy from the U.S. The amount of horrible things I've heard against him for being gay is insane. The amount of racist comments at lunch or once have been numerous. And the amount of jokes made about people who don't look like the average Chilean has been vast. I can't wait to get back to my liberal society.
10. I have loved traveling and loved Chile, but the U.S. always takes first place in my heart. I missed so many major events in the U.S. this past 6 months, and I wish I could have been there to celebrate. I missed the Warriors winning the NBA finals, the U.S. Women's National Soccer team winning the World Cup, and most importantly, I missed the Supreme Court ruling gay marriage legal. I wish I could have been there to celebrate all these events, but I know I get to go home and celebrate anyways.
I can't imagine not being in this country. It really is going to be so weird going back to the U.S. I have made so many friends here, both Chilean and North American, and the last week of goodbyes has been incredible sad. But the saddest goodbye is definitely my goodbye to Chile. So Chile, thank you for everything you've taught me, for allowing me to grow, giving me some crazy experiences and stories, letting me travel through insane climates, and giving me some of the best 5 months of my life. John Steinbeck once said, "People don't take trips, trips take people."
Goodbye to Chile and everyone who has made my experience what it is. I'll never forget you. Thank you for everything.
To the U.S.: I'll see you in a little over 24 hours.
1. My role as a U.S. citizen abroad. The role of the U.S. in Chilean history is vast and sad. From helping to create a terrible dictatorship to financing the disappearance and murder of thousands of Chilean citizens, the U.S. government has always had a part in Chilean history. For that reason, being from the U.S. has always felt a bit odd to me here. Not only do I have to carry the weight around with me knowing that where I'm from has done this, I also stick out like a sore thumb. Between my light complexion and blonde hair (in the U.S. I would never say I'm blonde but here I very much am), I am obviously not Chilean. So then people always ask where I'm from and when I say los Estados Unidos, there's a lot of ways people take it. Either they're jealous, they look at me with disgust, or they're fascinated by a gringa that can speak Spanish decently.
In addition to all of this, the U.S. culture has a huge influence on Chilean culture, specifically popular culture. One of my favorite things to do in Chile is go to the clubs and dance. Before I came to Chile, I was so excited to go out and listen to reggaeton and Chilean music in the clubs. However, about 90% of the music is from the U.S. At first I was completely surprised. But then I talked some to my host sister about music and her favorite artists are Adele and Taylor Swift. Not only does the U.S. influence music, but a lot of little things like shop names and labels are U.S. words or names. One of the biggest grocery stores here is called Lider and it's a Walmart company. The biggest food brand here is Nestle, and a lot of stores have english words in the titles because that supposedly makes it more high end.
The most important thing I've learned about being "estadounidense" (what they call people from the U.S. here) is that people from the U.S. aren't they only Americans. If someone here asks you where you're from and you say America, they're confused because they're American too. America doesn't just consist of the U.S., it's a multitude of countries. The U.S. isn't the center of the world, as sometimes we like to believe. We are just a small part of what is considered America and I think this is an important lesson that everyone should learn.
2. My ability to live without things I'm used to. I have gone the last five months without seeing my parents, hugging my dog, or seeing my best friends. And surprisingly, I've survived. For all who know me, I'm definitely an introvert and a homebody. I love being away from home but also being able to come back when I want to. With this experience, I couldn't do that. I couldn't go home and see my dog or my mom and I managed to survive.
3. My ability to adapt. The Chilean culture is entirely different than what I'm used to. I had to get used to living with a family again and letting someone know where I am at all times, living without the people that I'm used to, and eating food that I am not accustomed to eating. Despite all this, here I am five months later still alive. There were definitely moments where I was laying on my bed crying about the fact that I didn't think I could live in Chile for one more moment. But I lived through them and I definitely think I'm stronger because of it. (Of course it's a lot easier to say that on this side of things, but y'know we'll just go with it for now.)
4. Our role in the world is really insignificant. To be honest, this one seems a little silly. But I think my mantra of the trip has been, "We don't matter." Obviously, we do matter. But I have had the opportunity to experience everything from giant glaciers and mountains, to one of the driest deserts in the world, to seeing another universe. In Torres del Paine, I got to see a giant glacier, giant mountains, and natural rock formations unlike anything I've ever seen in the U.S. In San Pedro de Atacama, I basically saw the moon. I was in one of the driest deserts in the world. And on my astrology tour, I literally saw another universe with my naked eye. So yeah, maybe it is the end of the world for me when I ran out of milk for my morning coffee. But in the grand scheme, that doesn't matter. These amazing places created by nature, that matters more than running out of milk.
5. Food matters. Now, I have definitely adapted to the food here. That being said, I can't wait to get back to the U.S. and actually eat healthy again. The three foods that are eaten at every meal here are: bread, mayonnaise, and salt. I'm not kidding when I say they are at every meal. The average Chilean eats about 12 pieces of bread a day. A very typical Chilean breakfast is a cheese and butter sandwich. Ew. No thank you. Lunch usually consists of a salad (yay!) but then the dressing for the salad is mayonnaise. All the lunch food is cooked with a handful of salt and another sprinkle when it's done. Dinner isn't really dinner. It's sandwiches again, this time with mayonnaise, cheese, and ham. You get a tea too, except it has two tablespoons of sugar in it.
Having said all that, I really can't wait to get back to the U.S. and just eat a salad. Anyone who sees me within the first month or two of me being home will notice that I've gained weight here. And a decent amount for it to be this noticeable. For those who see me, don't mention it, please. I know I've gained weight and I'm working to get rid of it. The food we eat really does make a difference. I feel tired here a lot and I think that has to do a lot with how I'm eating. I definitely don't get the recommended amount of fruits and veggies, and eat way more carbs than I should. I also overeat here, a problem I never had in the U.S. Food matters and I can't wait to start eating like my normal self again.
6. My culture isn't necessarily the best. There are aspects of the Chilean culture that I have entirely loved. The biggest difference between Chilean and U.S. culture (for me) is that kids live with their parents a lot of the time until they're in their 30's. And even if they don't live with their parents, they call them everyday. There have been plenty of times I've been with my Chilean friends and they had to leave the room because it was the the time that they called their mom everyday. Whereas in the U.S., it's common that I don't talk to my parents for weeks at a time. There are aspects of the culture, such as this, that are definitely better in the Chile and that I hope to bring back to the U.S.
7. The complaints that I have everyday in the U.S. are definitely not always the biggest problems. I have seen extreme poverty and suffering here. I listened to the terrible disappearances of loved ones and family members of almost every family in Chile. I've heard terrible stories of domestic violence, abuse, rape, and inequality. Of course, all of these things exists in the U.S., but the magnitude and prevalence here is completely different. There have been so many times when I've been walking home alone, both at night and during the day, and I've been afraid that someone is going to come rob me, rape me, or kill me. These fears exist at a level that's nowhere near the level they exist in the U.S. for me. So all the complaints I have in the U.S. about being tired or cold are nothing in comparison to what some people live through.
8. The U.S. isn't the center of my universe. There are plenty of other places I can live and succeed. I have grown up with the idea that I will always spend my entire life in the U.S. But this experience has taught me without any uncertainty that I can survive and strive in another country. Because of this experience, I really would love to live in a foreign country and teach English. I have loved being able to live in a different culture than I'm used to and being able to do it again would be amazing. Although I have definitely struggled with having to speak Spanish all the time, I have also loved it. Coming back to a place where I would be able to do that would be amazing.
9. I am so excited to get back to a very liberal society. My time in Chile has been amazing and completely eye opening. That being said, it has also opened my eyes to the liberalness of U.S. society. I can't wait to get home and be able to openly speak my thoughts. I can't wait to tell people I'm Jewish, and not be afraid that they won't accept me. I can't wait to go home and not hear people being homophobic, racist, and classist at every moment of the day. Of course all of these things exist in the U.S. as well, but not nearly to the same extent that they exist here. The host student who was at my house before me was a gay guy from the U.S. The amount of horrible things I've heard against him for being gay is insane. The amount of racist comments at lunch or once have been numerous. And the amount of jokes made about people who don't look like the average Chilean has been vast. I can't wait to get back to my liberal society.
10. I have loved traveling and loved Chile, but the U.S. always takes first place in my heart. I missed so many major events in the U.S. this past 6 months, and I wish I could have been there to celebrate. I missed the Warriors winning the NBA finals, the U.S. Women's National Soccer team winning the World Cup, and most importantly, I missed the Supreme Court ruling gay marriage legal. I wish I could have been there to celebrate all these events, but I know I get to go home and celebrate anyways.
I can't imagine not being in this country. It really is going to be so weird going back to the U.S. I have made so many friends here, both Chilean and North American, and the last week of goodbyes has been incredible sad. But the saddest goodbye is definitely my goodbye to Chile. So Chile, thank you for everything you've taught me, for allowing me to grow, giving me some crazy experiences and stories, letting me travel through insane climates, and giving me some of the best 5 months of my life. John Steinbeck once said, "People don't take trips, trips take people."
Goodbye to Chile and everyone who has made my experience what it is. I'll never forget you. Thank you for everything.
To the U.S.: I'll see you in a little over 24 hours.
